I was driving home from work already in a bad mood. It was one of those days where you did 100 things but felt as if you had nothing to show for it. I hated feeling as if I hadn’t accomplished anything in a day so I had already compiled a to-do list a mile long that I wanted to accomplish once I got home. This would be in addition to trying to fit in quality time with my family, pay bills, cook dinner, do laundry, and then get myself prepared for the next day. I could forgot having time to relax, I was already booked solid for tonight, I would have to pencil that in for another day.
So, I sat there in traffic and started calculating how I would accomplish all of this in my mind as if I was putting several pieces of a puzzle together to make the chaotic picture that is currently my life. In a effort to drown out my busy mind I turned on my iPod. I listened to a few beats of one song but for no good reason would skip to the next. I was never quite satisfied with any song I came across. That’s an ok song I thought, but I could find something better, faster, more upbeat. Yeah this next song will make me feel better. But with each song that came on I found the same discontentment. This continued until I found myself in my driveway.
When my feet hit the floor of my living room it was like I had entered a race. I quickly picked up my baby and started hastily on my to-do list one handed. I began performing chores, tidying up, and half-heartedly answering my husbands attempt at a conversation with me, even though he could tell my mind was elsewhere. The baby became fussy so I knew it was time for our nightly walk. Crap! I hadn’t penciled that in either, I thought to myself as I shuffled around tasks in my head. As we began our stroll I again turned on my iPod. It was a “okay” song so I listened into the first chorus. I quickly dug my iPhone out of the stroller and hit the skip button, but nothing happened. The song continued to play. I hit it again, nothing. This irritated me and I stopped walking and actually looked at my phone. With force I began to tap the skip button repeatedly but the song continued to play in all of its glory.
I stopped. As I looked down at my sweet content baby, kicking his feet and gazing out into the world- wide eyed with the background noise of the song playing loudly, happily, and upbeat I realized something. I sat there like a scolded dog with its tail between its legs. I hear ya God, loud and clear I thought with a smile on my face.
He was telling me stop.
Stop trying to skip over this song.
Stop trying to skip over this season of life.
Stop trying to skip into bigger and better, faster, and quicker.
Stop trying to skip over the challenges, the grind, the hardships, just stop.
Listen to this song, listen to what I’m trying to teach you in this season of life, you may actually enjoy it.
I so often make the mistake of thinking that I will be happy when I get where I am going. But is this ever true? It’s never proven accurate for me. So, in that simple moment I was reminded on my walk that the secret to being happy is to be happy now, not later, because later may never come. I smiled because God has a simple yet powerful way to make an impact on us. So me and my baby listened to that song and then I listened to where I was in my life. I may not have checked off all of my “to-do” list for the day but I was present with my baby, present with my husband, and presently truly happy. I’m trying to omit the skip button in my life, trying to enjoy the song God is playing for me, listen to the lyrics, and be present. It is in God’s presence, his song, his timing that happiness takes place. So next time you have the urge to skip, refrain, and see what God has in store.